Bye bye. See ya. Errr who are you again?

Oh yes - Tulisa! Drug dealer and utterly talentless star of the worst sex tape I've ever seen. She is reportedly going to start a new life in Miami. It'll be interesting to see if the Americans will give her a visa as she will undoubtedly have a conviction very shortly for possession with intent to sell a class A drug.
I sincerely hope she gets in though as her alleged singing is an even more serious crime.
Other crimes include really unbelievably bad English for which she certainly deserves deportation.
To give you an example here are some recent tweets (for which I have to thank the Mail Online):

‘Me n mich r ready 4 Ibiza oi oi.’

‘Whoops 4got to thank @cathairine 4 make up, gotta give a bitch her full credit haha love it babes.’

‘Quick pose 4 @cathairine @russianlengths 2 flaunt me new locks wooooooooo.’

‘Buzzin with my new do thanks 2 @cathairine @russianlengths it’s going off this summer ooouuush.

No don't ask me. I haven't a clue what she means either.

Goodbye and good riddance.

Tulisa gives a blow by blow demonstration of her technique.

For blowing out candles of course. What did you think I meant?
But seriously. Is it any wonder that celebrities get caught out in sex tape scandals when they're also stupid enough to get pictured in scenarios, such as this, in the aftermath.
What a gift to a sleezy headline writer (such as myself) and to the paps who were, inevitably, present at Tulisa's birthday party in Ibiza.

Is the Tulisa sex tape story ever going to end?

Seemingly not if this article is anything to go by

Having read this item several times (no I've nothing better to do at present) I can find no definite indication as to the exact wording of the settlement or judgement reached in the legal action.
Reading between the lines I gather that Tulisa was concerned by rumours that she may have released the sex(?) tape herself for, presumably, reasons of publicity. I can recall no such rumours at the time and indeed she went to the trouble of making a you tube video condemning the film maker and orchestrator of her troubles, a certain Justin Edwards by name. I find it a bit strange therefore that she should take legal action just to prove something that most people already accepted especially as there has been no mention of damages, of undisclosed amount or otherwise.

In a rather bizarrely worded statement read outside the High Court Tulisa said:

I'm especially grateful for all the support I have received from the public, my friends, family and team.

The use of the word "especially" would usually suggest that there were other people to whom she was also grateful though in a lesser way. I wonder who else could there possibly be as she's already mentioned everybody who knows her or of her?
It's also rather odd that she has chosen this day to unveil her new hair. I can understand her desire to make a fresh start with a fresh appearance BUT she had her hair like this when she made the sex tape. Could it be that Ms Contostavlos is better at the publicity business than we have given her credit for and that she has dealt the press a very neat double bluff?

The Tulisa sex tape shock, horror, scandal

While trying to work out whether my annual income exceeds £150k and whether I will benefit from the 50p rate tax cut, I have found found time to wonder why the current woes of Tulisa Contostavlos have made the national news.
She has been forced into issuing a pathetically snivelling little video of her own because of her ill-judged denials made before the vidoe went online.
I just don't get to whom she thinks she is apologising. It's almost as if she imagines that she may be some kind of a role model to a legion of other young girls and has let them down in some way. Sorry Tulisa you don't do anything well enough to be a role model.
Or is she apologising to the general public. And if so why would she imagine that it comes as any surprise to us that a young girl has sex? Or perhaps she is apologising to the appalling Simon Cowell who must be rubbing his greedy little hands at the publicity while making crass remarks about his intention to "watch the video tonight"
There are however a couple of things that she has said which I find stupid and distasteful and warrant an immediate apology. In her video she says that; "when you judge someone, it doesn’t define the person who you’re judging, it defines you". Oh I see, so you mustn't judge a rapist or a child abuser in case it defines yourself in some way. Or is she saying that you shouldn't judge others if you're not prepared to be judged yourself? And what is saying about her role as an X Factor judge. I just don't get it.
And her other faux pas, and I admit that the media is equally at fault here, is continually talking about video "footage" when the item referred to is a digital recording. I know that I'm an old fart but at least I understand the difference.

Okay so I think that the actions of Justin Edwards are those of a despicable low life creep with no redeeming features whatsoever. But I also think that Tulisa is the author of her own misfortunes, real or imagined, in that she allowed herself to be filmed in the first place. Just plain old fashioned stupidity.
Later
Well maybe it's all becoming clearer as it seems likely that the whole thing has been a massive publicity stunt to publicise her debut single called "We are young". The song is cheap electro pop and features suggestive scenes. To my inexpert eye, it also seems somewhat badly dubbed - no pun intended.
Judge for yourself.