You might think there is nothing in this for me to get annoyed about.

After all, it's just a simple feature in the Daily Mail about my favourite Formula One driver Lewis Hamilton attending a film premier with Nicole Scherzinger. We can skip the bit where I explain why I think Nicole is so unsuitable for Lewis. After all if he's happy, he drives better and makes me happy too.

So we'll also skip the pics where Nicole proves that she cannot walk down a few steps without making making an exhibition of herself, whether accidentally or on purpose. No, we'll move on to where the Mail reporter decribes the incident of the split skirt and the steps:

I hate split infinitives especially where they make the sentence look ugly and clumsy. How much trouble would it have been to put: "she attempted to descend elegantly" instead? It looks better and doesn't break that basic rule of English grammar.

Talking of looking better and basic rules I couldn't help noticing that Lewis was wearing a wing collar with a conventional long tie instead of a bow tie which would have been more usual.